Friday Giveaway: miPump double breast pump

We are thrilled to be offering a breastpump in this week's giveaway! The First Years miPump Basic Double Pump is the perfect choice for moms on a budget. At around $80, it is the cheapest double electric pump on the market. It is compact and quiet, and it comes with a bag so it’s easy to carry and discreet. It’s small enough to carry in your purse and quiet enough that only mom knows she’s pumping. A convenient battery option means you can pump anywhere - I used mine in the nursing room at Disneyland recently. One of my favorite features is that the miPump includes a handle that allows you to pump with only one hand, so you can multi-task while pumping.

This is one of the best Friday Giveaways we've ever had, and as such, we are going to make entering a bit more work for you! Even if you aren't lactating, this would be the perfect shower gift to have on hand.

To enter, you must first do two things:

1. add our blog to your blogroll and leave a comment on this post with the link to your blog

2. become a "follower" of our blog by clicking here (or at the sidebar on the right)

Not so hard, right? (If you've already done both things just leave a comment). We will choose the winner at random from the comments, but you must have complied with our two requests in order to win!

[this giveaway will be closed this Thursday at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Friday!]
And now, for the winner of last week's giveaway:


(((((((((judybrittle))))))))))


Shoot us an email in the next two weeks to claim your prize!

I come from a long line of reactors . . .


I come from a long line of reactors. (No offense, Mom, it's just plain true.) We have a tendency to panic in response to pretty much anything. Or at least have a bit of an extreme reaction. Like if someone says, "Oh, I forgot the camera," we'll say, "OH MY GOOOSH!" (Gasp, shake head, humph)

(My poor husband.)



I've gotten a bit better about this over the years, if I do say so myself. But it's especially hard for me to remain cool and calm under pressure. And since a mother is pretty much always under pressure, this is something I struggle with.

I heard something recently that I immediately wrote in big letters and stuck to the fridge. It goes like this:

DON'T REACT, RESPOND.

Um, yeah Heather. That's kind of obvious isn't it?

Well, for me, NO. I'm someone who needs to mull over what words mean for them to really take a seat in my scattered mind. So I loved thinking over how true this simple statement is. When something happens, big or small, what's the difference between reacting and responding?

Responding is intentional, it's thought through rationally, even in just a moment. Reacting is simply a knee-jerk in which someone almost always gets hurt by my response. Or at the very least they're irritated, annoyed, or frustrated by my irrational reaction.

Right after I heard this, my closest friend called so we could catch up on our weekends. She told me about a BBQ she and her kids had gone to on Saturday. There were a lot of kiddos at the party, and my friend was sitting with the adults while the kids played on the other side of a line of trees. There was an above-ground pool near where the kids were playing, but since it was pretty cold out that evening, it was covered with a tarp that was held down with bungee cords. My friend was talking with a group of people when in the middle of the conversation the thought went through her head, "There's someone in the pool." (Yeah, pretty crazy since she hadn't heard anything that would make her think that.) She walked through the trees to see a two year old boy tangled in the tarp with his head under the water.

Did she scream? No. Did she panic? No. I know this because she talked about being calm, and I also know this because I know her. She responds, she doesn't react. She could have had the whole place in a chaotic uproar, but she simply took care of business, carefully removing the boy and pulling him to safety. She must have gotten there right after he went under because he didn't even sputter. He just wanted her to hold him, he was cold, and I'm sure a bit shocked. So she carried him back to the house and asked the host for a towel. She calmly let his mother know what happened without giving her details. He was fine after all, and her response was one that was thought-through. Why make this nightmare even worse for these parents?

I don't know what I would have done, I probably would have screamed and flailed or something. I'd like to think I've made progress enough to believe I could pull it together, but I don't know.

All I know for now is that I'd like to keep reading those words on my fridge and applying them to our daily lives. Hopefully I won't need them for a life-threatening emergency, but I'd love to respond with actions and words that are life-giving rather than knee-jerk reactions that hurt the hearts of my husband and boys. If I read them enough, maybe when someone spills juice or hits their brother, I'll be able to pause a moment and respond rather than growling without thinking.

Heather writes at The Extraordinary Ordinary

WORKS FOR ME WEDNESDAY: Watercolors With Less Mess



My kids love painting with watercolors. What this Mama does not love is the amount of watery paint that drips off the paper onto the table and the floor. There is also often an inevitable melt-down because so much water was used that the paper will tear and the masterpiece is ruined.

Solution :: use paper plates to paint with watercolors. They are thicker than your average paper so there is less chance of a tear catastrophe, the ridges on the edges keep water from trickling off the masterpiece onto the floor, and the circle shape allows the kids to create outside of the “box”.

TALK BACK: What do your kids call your friends?

It's always an awkward protocol - figuring out how your children should refer to other adults. Some people prefer the intimacy of first names, while others feel it is more respectful to use last names.

What do your kids call your friends? What about the parents of their own friends? How did you come to that decision?

Thai Ginger Chicken


Ingredients

1 bunch fresh cilantro, stems removed
3 jalapenos, seeded and chopped
1 2-inch piece fresh ginger, peeled and thinly sliced
3 tablespoons olive oil
1 medium yellow onion, sliced
1 small eggplant, quartered lengthwise and sliced 1/2 inch thick crosswise
2 13.5-ounce cans unsweetened coconut milk
2 tablespoons soy sauce
1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 pound boneless, skinless chicken breasts, 1/2 inch thick
2 cups cooked rice (I prefer brown jasmine)

Directions

1 Place the cilantro, jalapenos, ginger, and 1 tablespoon of the oil in a food processor and pulse until combined.

2 Heat the remaining oil in a large saucepan over medium heat. Add the onion and eggplant and cook until softened, about 5 minutes.
3 Add the coconut milk, soy sauce, and 1/2 teaspoon of the salt. Bring to a simmer.
4 Add the reserved cilantro mixture, the remaining salt, and the chicken. Simmer gently until the chicken is cooked through and the sauce thickens slightly, about 7 minutes. Serve over the rice.

Raising Kids Who Care

These inpsiring stories about developing empahty in children comes from from Martha Fay at Reader's Digest. Five families show you how to get started, stay committed, and make a real difference.


ENCOURAGE THEIR PASSION
Phil and Anne Holland-McCowan
John, 16; Harrison, 13

John Holland-McCowan was sitting on a beach in Hawaii with his parents and his baby brother, Harrison, happily playing with coconuts and driftwood. "I'm so lucky," the almost-five-year-old suddenly announced. "I have all these toys to play with and all my toys at home."
His startled parents replied that he was indeed lucky, since a lot of kids didn't have any toys at all. "That's when he started to cry," recalls his mother, Anne.

"How can that be?" John asked. "We have to get toys for those children."

His parents naturally wondered if it was just some kind of phase, but as soon as they returned home, John began hoarding his small allowance to buy toys for other kids and urging his friends to do the same. His parents responded by organizing pizza suppers for other families interested in helping underprivileged children. "We just want to cheer kids up," John explained.
"It was so great and so simple," says Anne, who set out to find a place that would allow children as young as six and seven to volunteer. "It took a lot of phone calls," admits the longtime volunteer. "We finally got Scribbles and Giggles [scribblesandgiggles.com], a day-care center for medically fragile children, to let John and his friend Jane visit. They went and just played with these kids, zipping around the room as if they belonged there. And these were children with tubes in their throats and all kinds of medical problems."

John and his friends named their enterprise Kids Cheering Kids (kidscheeringkids.com), and today there are 19 chapters in the greater San Jose/ South Bay area; another in Metairie, Louisiana; and still another in Portland, Oregon. John is 16 now, a six-one sophomore and a water polo star at Menlo High School. He still visits kids at the San Jose Family Center, helping out with a carnival they're putting on. He's also working with Angels on Stage (angelsonstage.org) in the South Bay to prepare a performance of The Wizard of Oz starring children with disabilities.

The spirit of helping is as fresh as it was that day in Hawaii. "The whole purpose," he says, "is to make the kids feel better."

START THEM YOUNG
Kathy and Andy Saulitis
John, 20; Peter, 19; Kathryn, 16

Twelve years ago, when her three children were small, Kathy Saulitis heard a high school student speaking at a PTA meeting about a community service project he'd organized. "I thought, I want my children to grow up to be just like him," says Kathy. "I want them to learn how to give, develop compassion and empathy, and be around kids of diverse backgrounds."
Kathy contacted Kids Care Clubs (kidscare.org), a clearinghouse that matches people in need with kids who want to volunteer, and started a chapter in her town. Her efforts jump-started her children's interest in service-though each took a slightly different path.

Ten-year-old John didn't immediately see why people needed help at all. "His initial reaction at one food drive was 'They just need to go get a job,'" his mother recalls. In simple language, she explained about income versus expenses. With time, she says, "he understood." John carried that lesson throughout adolescence as he tutored underprivileged kids, something he still does as a college student.

John's brother, Peter, took to volunteer work more easily. He helped out at a nursing home and in the Little League Challenger Division program (littleleague.org), which pairs young athletes with children who have mental and physical challenges but long to play baseball.
Kathryn "wasn't that comfortable going into soup kitchens," her mother says, but is participating in book drives and activities for residents at a local nursing home. She has also started a global awareness club at her high school.

"It's important for parents to be models," Kathy says. "If someone can't reach a shelf in the store, help out. Or give someone a meal. You need to give that charitable muscle a workout whenever you can."

INVOLVE THE WHOLE FAMILY
Susan and Mike Overton
Emily Myers, 19

"When you have an only child, you always worry about her never having to share," says Susan Overton. "We wanted our daughter to connect with other people and to understand what community means."
Susan and Mike had always encouraged doing good deeds as a family, from buying Christmas presents for the needy to working with youth groups. By the time their daughter, Emily, was in high school, she was helping to mentor younger girls in a program called the Ophelia Project. When Catholic Charities (catholiccharitiesusa.org) was looking for volunteers to help settle refugee families, however, Emily and her parents were in for some fresh challenges.
"The first time we met them, it was a huge shock," says Emily of the family of six from Burundi who became their responsibility. The father was widowed—his wife had died in a camp in Tanzania—and there were five children, ages 1 to 13.

"They barely spoke English, so we used sign language," Emily remembers. Susan and Emily visited three times a week. Susan helped the father enroll the older children in school and arranged for the younger ones to attend day care so he could look for work. Mike helped the family hang shelves and stabilize the rickety bunk beds. "We were helping them adjust to life in America," says Emily, "but they also gave so much back to us. They appreciated everything. I'd like my own children to have experiences like that."

INVOLVE THEIR FRIENDS
Virginia Hensen
Emily, 23, and Elizabeth, 21

Virginia Hensen recalls dragging her older daughter "kicking and screaming" to her first meeting of the National Charity League (nationalcharityleague.org), a mother-daughter service organization. Emily was in seventh grade, a time when "kids are beginning to not want you around," says her mother. "But I wanted to have quality time with my kids beyond going to the mall to look for the latest pair of jeans."

One of the places the mothers had selected for their daughters to volunteer was a shelter for homeless teenagers called the Street Light Youth Shelter. Before their first stints, the girls were invited to tour the center during the day when no one was there. "Walking through, we saw these dreary wooden bunks where the kids came to sleep when it was raining," says Virginia. "My younger daughter, Elizabeth, was with us, and she saw a teddy bear on one of the bunks that was exactly the same as one she had at home. It hit her like a brick: I could be that child sleeping in this shelter. It was a 'there but for the grace of God' moment."

Emily, now in her second year with Teach for America (teachforamerica.org) on Chicago's South Side, remembers volunteering with friends at another shelter. "My friends and I would bake cookies the night before and bring bagels for kids the next morning. Peer involvement was what made it fun and cool."

Emily also remembers when she and her friends volunteered at a roller skating event during the Special Olympics (specialolympics.org). "That was my first encounter with people with disabilities," says Emily, who admits she'd have been uncomfortable going alone but was fine with friends.

TAKE VOLUNTEERING ON THE ROAD
Jeffrey and Linda Church
Nina, 15; Josh, 14; Rachel, 11; Jacob, 10

"Ever since our kids were little," says Jeff Church, a San Diego businessman, "they've been dropping their extra coins into an aluminum tzedakah box [tzedakah is Hebrew for "charity"] that my wife keeps in the kitchen. Once a year, they empty it out and decide what organizations they want to donate to that year."

The tzedakah tradition mirrors in miniature the focused approach to philanthropy that the Churches have practiced for years, combining giving with discussion and reflection. "They're all wonderful kids," says their father, "but as they were getting older, I wanted them to understand that there is more to charity than writing checks. I wanted them to develop a passion of their own."

Jeff's own passion is alleviating poverty in Africa, a cause he and his wife have long supported through the nonprofit organizations Millennium Promise (millenniumpromise.org) and Free the Children (freethechildren.com). This year, the Churches decided their kids should see some of the projects up close. It was no trip to Disneyland. First stop was southern Ethiopia, where they visited a microdam project designed to capture the runoff of seasonal rains in order to irrigate crops and provide drinking water.

The second stop was a village in rural Kenya, where the Churches accompanied local girls on their daily rounds to collect water for their families, a task that was preventing them from attending school. "Imagine a three-mile, two-hour walk carrying something as big and heavy as a piece of luggage on your back," says Jeff. Free the Children is building a series of one-room schoolhouses with tin roofs that capture rainwater and allow the girls to study—at least while it rains.

"For my kids to see how micro-development works up close was a beautiful thing," says Jeff. "I'd never seen smiles as large and deep on my children's faces as I saw that week. To see them experiencing that satisfaction was like nothing else.

Friday Giveaway: Kiss My Face Kid's Line


The kids’ collection from Kiss My Face has packaging that highlights various endangered species and provides facts and tidbits on each animal. Inside, parents will find products free of artificial colors, fragrances, parabens and SLS, and boasting natural ingredients such as Organic Green Tea Extract to protect against sun damage, Nettle Extract to stimulate hair growth and improve the condition of the scalp and Tea Tree Oil to kill germs.


Kiss My Face wants to share its kids line with one lucky mama!

Leave us a comment answering this question:
What is your kids' favorite part of taking a bath?

How to Get Extra Entries:
***When you enter an extra entry you must post a *separate comment* for each entry, sorry but we can’t keep track of extra entries unless you do this. ***
1 digg and 1 stumble by clicking on this article and submitting the buttons at the bottom for digg and stumble
2 join our Mama Memo mailing list by clicking here
3 join our facebook network by clicking here
4 put our blog in your blogroll or link list and leave a comment with the link to your blog

[this giveaway will be closed on Thursday, June 9th, at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Friday!]

And now, for the winner of last week's giveaway:
(((annalene)))

Congratulations! Shoot us an email in the next two weeks and we will hook you up.

operation grocery acquisition #2: total disaster

I am trying so hard not to be Chaotic Mom. You know her: she's the mom who is sweating at the restaurant as her unruly children run circles around the table, or the mom with screaming and kicking kids on the plane. She's the mom on Supernanny. The mom you don't want to stand next to in line. The one whose kids make a scene at the grocery store.

And today, she is me.

Oh, I had the best of intentions. After my last grocery shopping fiasco, where someone threatened to call the cops on me, I decided I would do most of my shopping online for a while. Last night I placed an order with Vons.com, and I mapped out a peaceful day of picking the kids up from preschool and the four of us relaxing in the backyard while our groceries were delivered. This went awry when Vons called me this morning, telling me my ATM card wouldn't process. The bank had sent me a new card right before Karis was born, and I kept forgetting to activate it and switch over. Apparently, today was my deadline, and the Von's truck left the station without my order.

We really needed groceries. So I called my bank to activate my card (finally) and figured I could swing by Trader Jo's on the way home. How hard can that be?

The trouble started with the fact that Jafta will no longer fit in the cart with the girls, so I had what I refer to as an "uncontained child". He also decided he needed to carry one of the baskets, which I agreed to because I thought it would keep him occupied. Wrong choice. Jafta has absolutely no sense of space around him. I am quite sure he would fail a field sobriety test if ever asked to walk in a straight line because he cannot walk in a straight line. He is a bumper, a mover and a shaker. He knocked that friggin basket into cans, he upset piled boxes, and I believe he bumped the elbow or butt of ever single individual in the store.

Okay, shopping was chaotic, but manageable. The kids were saving up for a dramatic climax, though. As I pulled my cart up to pay, Karis began screaming at the top of her lungs. It was a crazy loud newborn dolphin cry - the kind that leaves your ears ringing. Everyone was staring. It was so loud you couldn't not look. I tried to shush her and willed the checker to hurry up. The other two were begging to go up to the "manager's station" where they can receive a lollipop. It was about ten feet from the checkout line so I told them they could go by themselves. I thought this would make them feel big and also would occupy them while I dealt with the screamer. They made their way over there and suddenly I hear someone else screaming. That would be my other daughter - who has hurled herself onto the floor after learning that Jafta received the last lollipop in their stash. (okay, and seriously Trader Joe's staff - why would you give one kid a lollipop when you see another one standing there?). So I have to leave a wailing newborn to go pick up India off the floor - who is doing the "gone limp" tantrum and refuses to stand up. Everyone in the store continues to stare, and I have to pick India up off the floor, at which point I noticed she has pooped her pants. How do I know she has pooped her pants? Because it gets all over my arm when I pick her up.

Now I have crap on myself, two screaming kids, and I just want to get out of there, fast, when suddenly I hear the checker say, "I'm sorry, ma'am, the card was declined". Awesome. Apparently the new card was not properly activated. By some miracle of God I actually had some cash with me, but it was not enough. So I got the pleasure of having the checker void items one by one until we reached a lower total, which required calling a manager over while the entire store continued to stare at my screaming children, my poopy arm, and my inability to afford my groceries. (Yes, now all three were screaming, because I forced Jafta to share his lollipop with India and he was none too happy about it).

I am staying in the house today. I am staying in the house for a long time. Maybe until Jafta is old enough to get the groceries himself.

WORKS FOR ME WEDNESDAY: two kids, one computer



This is an oldie, but a goodie, and still works for me.



My two-year-old daugther really wants to play computer games like her big brother. However, every time I let her sit down to the computer, she would bang on the keys and move the mouse like a toy car, which usually resulted in opening files, prompting printer boxes, and any other number of right-click functions that threatened to crash the computer. Not to mention, her brother didn't like being kicked off his game only to watch her terrorize the hard drive.

I finally figured out a solution that makes everyone happy, and cost me about $15 total ($3 for a monitor splitter and a trip to a few garage sales for old computer parts.) This is also how mommy finds time to blog!


P.S. If you are looking for a great educational program for your child, check out the free games at www.starfall.com.

TALK BACK: Breastfeeding on Facebook


In case you haven't heard, there is quite a stir going on at Facebook about breastfeeding shots. Several months ago, Facebook deleted any photos of women breastfeeding their children. The removal of the photographs has many women outraged.


Some who post the pictures believe the photographs are helpful to other women, while others find the pictures offensive. Some believe that breastfeeding is a private matter between mother and child and should not be posted online. Others find the pictures beautiful.


What do you think? Should these photographs be removed? Are they obscene or is it discrimination?


In case you are interested, here is the petition: Hey Facebook, Breastfeeding Isn't Obscene. And if you are on facebook, click the link on the left to join our network!

Smoothie Recipes

Last year, a couple of our readers asked us to post some smoothie recipes beyond the typical OJ/strawberry/banana routine. I made my kitchen became a smoothie testing lab, and I'm sharing the best results again. If you've yet to hop on the smoothie bandwagon, here is your official invitation! It's an easy way to get picky eaters an extra serving of fruits and veggies.

For most of my smoothies, I start with a base of orange juice, plain kefir, ground flax seeds, and spinach. Yes, spinach. THEY WILL NEVER NOTICE. The kefir adds a nice tart kick, and is full of healthy probiotics. Plain yogurt works well, too. If your kids are used to sweeter smoothies from sweetened yogurt (which is full of sugar), you could try adding some agave nectar. And about that spinach. Start with a pinch, and increase every day. If the color is an issue, hide the smoothie in a straw-top sports cup.




Tropical Green Machine (Jafta's favorite)
1/2 cup frozen mango
1/2 cup frozen pinapple
1/2 cup OJ
1/2 cup kefir
1 cup rainbow chard
1 tbsp flax seed
agave to taste






Berry Blast with Spinach (India's favorite)
1/2 cup frozen mixed berries
1/2 cup frozen strawberries
1/2 cup OJ
1 cup spinach
1 tbsp flax seed
agave to taste



Orange Dream (my favorite)

1 cup grated carrots
1 cup OJ
1/2 cup kefir
1 tbsp flax seed
agave to taste




All of the smoothies were a hit with my son. My daughter didn't care for the carrot. But both of them drank a 6-ounce cup of their favorite and got a full serving of veggies, antioxidants, DHA, and protein. My kids aren't always the best eaters, so it's nice to know that they are at least starting the day off with some good stuff. It makes me relax when lunch is not so great!




What are your favorite smoothie blends? Share your own recipes with us!

Books on the Cheap

Love books, but don't love the cost? We have some great sites that offer a way to get books for little to no money.

Bookmooch is essentially an online book-swapping community. You list a book you are willing to give, and send it to someone who "mooches" it from you. Every time you give someone a book, you earn a point and can get any book you want from anyone else at BookMooch. Once you've read a book, you can keep it forever or list it again for someone else. They carry all types of books, from the classics to children's books. Paperbackswap works in a similar way to Bookmooch, but focuses more on trade paperbacks, if that is your thing!

Bookswim is the Netflix for books. It is an online book rental library service lending out paperbacks, hardcovers and now college textbooks Netflix®-style directly to your house, without the need to purchase. You can read your books as long as you want, and then return them for other titles. Similiar to Netflix, the shipping is free both way.

Amazon is probably the world's biggest website for books, and I have spent a pretty penny there! They have a feature where you can buy used books from sellers who list on their site. I've found that the used books are often in new condition and come at anywhere from a 20% to 60% discount even after you factor out shipping


There is an up-and-coming site called Main Street Fair that contributes a percentage of its income to schools across America. The concept is a result of a single mother of an 11-year-old who became frustrated by dismal education funding and also realized that people don't have the money to continually make school contributions. It is essentially an easier to use ebay that gives back to schools. How cool is that? This is a great place for all you crafty mamas to share your products and raise money for education. They also offer free listings for college textbooks, since the price of textbooks can often be a huge expense for students.

Friday Giveaway: Knudsen's Sparkling Essence Beverages

Not in need of more calories? Think about this. As Americans consume more calories than ever before, it is important to understand that beverages can often be the leading culprit. Recent research from American Journal of Clinical Nutrition showed that cutting down on liquid calories had a stronger effect on weight loss than reducing calories from solid foods.

We have fallen for this new zero-calorie beverage from R.W. Knudsen Family , Sparkling Essence.  It is a simple combination of sparkling spring water infused with the finest organic ingredients.  

Available in Organic Lemon, Organic Cucumber, Organic Blueberry and Organic Mint
Zero-calorie, zero-sugar, zero artificial flavors.

How is it zero-everything? The organic ingredients are brewed in fresh spring water. Then the fruit is extracted leaving only the subtle flavor of the fruit without the sugar or calories

Essences are packaged in 10.5-ounce slim cans, sold individually and in 4-pack carriers and will be available in grocers nationwide starting in June.

We will be giving away a full set of all 4 flavors for a lucky mama to try!

Answer the following question to be entered in the giveaway:

What liquid calories would you like to cut back on consuming?



How to Get Extra Entries:
***When you enter an extra entry you must post a *separate comment* for each entry, sorry but we can’t keep track of extra entries unless you do this. ***
1 digg and 1 stumble by clicking on this article and submitting the buttons at the bottom for digg and stumble
2 join our Mama Memo mailing list by clicking here
3 join our facebook network by clicking here
4 put our blog in your blogroll or link list and leave a comment with the link to your blog

[this giveaway will be closed on Thursday, July 2nd, at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Friday!]

And now, for the winner of last week's giveaway:
(((((Laura Benjamin)))))

shoot us an email and we will hook you up!

How to share the chores equally

On Saturday morning Ryan and I buckled the boys in the van and we went to a neighborhood garage sale. We even got to follow a little map, it was a like a real treasure hunt. But anyway, that's not the moral of this story. It's not even really a moral at all, but it's not the point either.

The point is, I took the opportunity of a confined space to discuss the day's plans with my husband. You see, Saturdays can be tricky for us. If we don't have daytime plans like a birthday party or a tennis match or a gala...

(Yes, those last two were jokes, we hardly ever exercise play tennis anymore, and when we do, it's not scheduled. And we hardly ever go to galas anymore either.)

What I'm trying to say, is that if Ryan and I don't discuss what we have in mind on an open Saturday, we fight. Because I'm thinking it would be a good day to clean and catch up on laundry, with his help, and he's dreaming of a round of golf and a nap yard work. So if we don't communicate openly, we go in opposite directions and confuse each other.

That's why, while we were in the van, I let my loving husband know what I had in mind and made a mental note of his enthusiastic agreement to help me clean.

After the boys got up from their naps, I could see that Ryan's enthusiasm had waned. I knew I needed to make this whole cleaning thing more exciting. That's when it hit me. Boys love competition! I could make this a competition!

So I said, "OK people, break into teams!!! One of you small people goes with Daddy, and one of you goes with me!! Daddy's team will start at the front end of the house, Mommy's team will start at the back end of the house!!!"

(All three stood staring at me as if I were a crazy person, but I saw the glimmer in Ryan's eyes and I knew it was working.)

I went on, "We'll clean as fast as we can, and whoever gets to this line (I pointed to the hallway past our kitchen) the fastest WINS!!!"

And that's when it happened. Ryan turned and headed for the living room, his end of the house, Asher following closely behind his heals to "help." (Yes, I gave him the most distractable teammate.) I could see by the way he was carrying himself that my plan had worked. He was on a mission. To win.

That's when I headed to the back bathroom, threw open the window and chatted with Neighbor Bob for a while. After talking for a few minutes, Miles on my hip, I told Bob we better get going, after all, we were in a race. He laughed with me about how Ryan must be frantically cleaning the living room right at that moment. And he was, I took a peek when I went to get my supplies.

You see, I was in no hurry. Of course I was going to let him win! That's the only way we'll ever have this productive of a competition again. So I took my time a little, don't judge!

Every once and awhile, Ryan and I would bump into each other, fighting over the vacuum, talking smack, and actually having a good time cleaning. In the end, he did win, and he and Asher were quite proud. I hope he remembers that feeling.

Sure, I feel a twinge of guilt as I write this, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to do it again.

The lesson here is two-fold: 1. Communicate your Saturday plans openly. 2. Have fun!


Heather writes at The Extraordinary Ordinary

WORKS FOR ME WEDNESDAY: heating up a bottle



Here at the Mama Manifesto, we are jumping on the bandwagon. The "Works for Me Wednesday" bandwagon, that is. Turns out there is a whole blogworld out there of moms, sharing their best tips every Wednesday. We like that.
Today's tip is for moms with wee ones. I think we've all been tempted to zap a cold bottle in the microwave just to "take the chill off". When you've got a screaming baby who wants to eat NOW, it's not the time you want to be standing over the stove, boiling water for ten minutes to create a warm bath for the bottle. Not to mention, boiling water while holding a baby can be a safetly concern.

I finally found a way to heat up my baby's bottles quickly, using the speed of the microwave without exposing the milk to harmful rays. I keep a plastic cup next to the fridge, and zap a half cup of water in the microwave for one minute Then I sit the cold bottle in the cup, and spin it for two minutes. Voila! Warmed milk in three minutes flat, with no microwave exposure.
Did you know that warming the milk, in any way, can break down the helpful properties of breastmilk? Another tip I learned is to begin to train your baby to accept cold milk, since that is the way breastmilk is usually stored. As your baby adjusts to accepting a bottle, gradually heat it less and less. By the time my first daughter was six months, she was comfortable with both breastfeeding and drinking expressed milk straight out of the fridge. This made life a lot easier for me, and assured that the breastmilk was not being comprised by overheating.

TALK BACK: confession time

There's a saying I like that rings true for many of us:


"I was an amazing parent until I had children"


What are some of the surprises about parenting that you would not have expected? What are some of the things you do as a parent (or let your kids get away with) that you never thought you would do?

Lazy Mama's Crockpot Lasagna

This is a fabulous crock pot recipe from reader Christine:

1 diced onion
couple of cloves minced garlic
oregano, basil
2 large cans crushed tomatoes
1 lb ground something (we like turkey)
3-4 cups shredded mozzarella
2 15oz cottage cheese
1 box lasagna noodles (I always get whole wheat)

Brown 1 lb of something with onions, garlic, oregano, basil and throw in some salt and pepper, of course. Toss in the crushed tomatoes. You layer everything in the crock pot: broken up dry noodles, meat mixture, cottage cheese, mozzarella. I do about three layers, so just divide up everything you have by three and get to layering. 3-5 hours on low. I always then turn it off and let it sit a good 15 minutes, as sometimes it may not have thickened up (because I always forget to get it going in time and am barely making the three-hour mark). Granted, nobody cares. It's yum.

baby fat

Parenting a newborn is hard. One major plus about adopting is that you aren't simultaneously dealing with the ego blow of having your body morphed beyond recognition after a pregnancy. I truly believe that the weight gain aspect is one of the unmentioned curses of childbearing. Your world is already being rocked with a crying baby, no sleep, breastfeeding woes, and an end to freedom as you know. Let's tack on top of that the fact that all of this will be happening while you struggle to find an outfit that fits over your blown-out midsection. And in order to feed your child, you must pull your shirt up and expose said blown-out midsection every 2-3 hours. You also get to constantly shield questions about when you are due if you dare to venture out of the house without the baby. Oh, and sometimes people inquire about your pregnancy while you are holding the newborn.



People. A public service announcement. If you see a woman with a child who does not yet walk or talk, DO NOT ask her if she is pregnant. No matter how pregnant she looks. Filter that question and tell her she has a nice personality or something.


With both my full-term pregnancies, I gained a lot of weight. With Karis, I gained an ENTIRE JAFTA. And he's obese . . . so that's a lot. I am pretty determined to lose it, but it is hard because every time I try to work out, something like this happens:





It's also hard because breastfeeding makes me ravenously hungry. The other day, a friend was over and I was whining about the extra weight. And she said, "Oh, but you are breastfeeding, so the weight should just melt off." And then we both started maniacally laughing because WHATEVER. Who does that actually work for?


[No one I would want to be friends with].


Another bonus of this stage is that nothing fits. I refuse to buy clothing in the size I am at right now. I am trying to think positively - and I am hopeful this is a transitional size. Which means that I am left wearing maternity clothes still - which are now too loose. They are always falling down, and I am always hiking them back up or exposing my backside when I sit down. It's pretty.


A few weeks ago someone told me about a blog called Shape of a Mother. It's awful. Hideous. And a totally accurate picture of what happens to a woman's body after giving birth. I love it. Living in Orange County, I sometimes need to remind myself what normal is. Normal is being a wee bit fluffy for a while after giving birth.

And that's okay.



Totally worth it.

Friday Giveaway: Let The Body Shop pamper mama & baby

We are very excited to get to partner with The Body Shop with a giveaway for mama & baby. We have great respect for this company.

Since it's inception, this company has really done its part to not only bring quality natural products to the market, but also to impact the world.

The Body Shop® believes that business has the power to make the right kind of difference to the world. This principle allows our customers around the world become "activists," simply by choosing from our range of products. As Dame Anita Roddick said: "Activism isn't listed on The Body Shop® labels as an ingredient, but it is there as surely as the bergamot and hemp oil."

Here are examples of just some of the initiatives that have recently been supported by The Body Shop:

  • The Body Shop is the first cosmetics company to source sustainably harvested palm oil and introduce the ingredient into the beauty industry, working in partnership with a certified organic producer in Colombia, in 2007.
  • In early 2008 The Body Shop introduced 100% PCR bottles (post consumer recycled), while all their PET bottles (polyethylene terephthalate) currently contain at the minimum 30% recycled material, with a target to convert to 100% within the next 12 months.
  • Their unique Community Trade program creates sustainable trading relationships with disadvantaged communities around the world and provides essential income to more than 25,000 people across the globe.
  • The Body Shop continues to raise awareness and funding for women across the world affected by domestic violence in 2008. Their  "Stop Violence In The Home" campaign runs in more than 55 countries and has raised in excess of US$4 million.
  • They have committed to becoming Carbon Neutral by 2010, ensuring that carbon dioxide emissions from the company's core retail business worldwide are reduced.
  • They're committed to trading ethically - their sourcing team is trained in ethical audits and we only trade with suppliers who are committed to our Code of Conduct for Suppliers.
For Mama :
Wild Cherry Body Butter is an intensive, creamy and fragrant all-over body moisturizer that hydrates, conditions and delicately scents the skin with its sensational cherry fragrance. Easily absorbed, this Body Butter provides lasting moisturization and features wild cherry oil and Community Trade skin-caring soya oil from Brazil and olive oil from Italy.

This kit has Wild Cherry Body Butter, Wild Cherry Shower Gel, Wild Cherry Body Scrub, Wild Cherry Body Puree, Wild Cherry Soap, and Wild Cherry LipButter. While The Body Shop keeps packaging to a minimum, key products in the range are packaged in 100% PCR bottles (made from post-consumer recyclate, the highest standards in use of recylate).



For Baby:
It's important to nourish, nurture and protect a baby's delicate skin, especially after this harsh winter weather. Now, you can create bonding opportunities with your precious bundle of joy using these infant and baby bath products — including baby body butter, body wash, lotion, shampoo and more, featuring buriti oil, an oil rich in beta carotene, pro-vitamin A, oleic fatty acids and essential fatty acids.


Leave us a comment answering the following question:
What is your favorite way to pamper yourself or your baby?

How to Get Extra Entries:
***When you enter an extra entry you must post a *separate comment* for each entry, sorry but we can’t keep track of extra entries unless you do this. ***
1 digg and 1 stumble by clicking on this article and submitting the buttons at the bottom for digg and stumble
2 join our Mama Memo mailing list by clicking here
3 join our facebook network by clicking here
4 put our blog in your blogroll or link list and leave a comment with the link to your blog

[this giveaway will be closed on Thursday, June 25th, at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Friday!]

And now, for the winner of last week's giveaway:

(((((Brenda S.)))))

Shoot us an email and we will hook you up!

Books That Inspire Cooperation

For sure one of the best tools in our home for working on “stuff”, whether it is fears, attitudes, upcoming changes, education, is our book collection.


Here are a few of my favorites for promoting good behavior in toddlers & preschoolers:

Llama Llama Mad at Mama, by Anna Dewdney
A patient mama llama shows her cranky son that cooperation can make even a boring trip to Shop-O-Rama fun.

Five Nice Mice, by Chisato Tashiro
After being shut out of a frogs-only concert, the mice decide to put on their own show and end up making beautiful music with everyone – including the frogs.

Duck & Goose, by Tad Hills
Duck & Goose have a big fight over a giant egg. When it turns out to be a ball, they learn to play with it together.

Grumpy Bird, by Jeremey Tankard
Bird is having a bad day until a parade of animal pals follows him around and helps turn his frown upside down.




The Tale of Pip & Squeak, by Kate Duke
Two mouse brothers with nothing in common work together to throw the best party ever.

{What are your “teachable moment” books of choice? Any books you love for elementary aged kids that foster cooperation and good behavior?}

You get what you focus on

The extra long hugs, the wiping of tears,
the in-depth answers to the many whys.
the playing at the park,
the looking long into blue eyes,
A million I love yous.
The dancing in the kitchen,
the ruffling of hair.
The wrapping snug in a towel
and holding close.
The tucking in
and lingering long.
The breathing in
The heart swelling.

Sure, there are stresses and strains that turn me ugly around every corner, but there are many more moments that are the ones that truly define me as a mother. I just keep forgetting to look at those. My meltdowns are simply inevitable responses to all the plate spinning, balls in the air, tightrope walking, and pressure. The funny thing is, when I accept these moments of snapping and grumping without guilt, they are fewer, and life seems even more full of lovely.


lovely feet

lovely mud

lovely ride

lovely diaper butt


Heather writes at The Extraordinary Ordinary

TALK BACK: your baby carrying questions answered


Babywearing expert Laurel McCarthy is here to answer our questions on all things slings! She is the owner of Carry Me Away, an amazing store and online educational resource for babywearing.


Do you have a question about baby carrying? Have some questions about using them correctly, or wondering which one to buy? Leave your questions in the comments here, and Laurel will answer!

Father's Day Gift Guide

Is it just me, or are men hard to buy for? I can always please my mom with a candle, or some pampering body products. But I'm never quite sure what to get my father or husband. Here are some ideas to help break out of the "new tie" niche for Father's Day:

We mamas are big fans of the baby carriers, and there are so many dad-friendly slings on the market today that would make a great gift. One new take on the traditional framed carrier is The Kokopax. Built with a frame like a camping backpack, it is comfortable enough to use for the active endeavors dad might enjoy. It's perfect for walks or hiking, and offers a safe and comfortable ride for baby. The fabrics are gender-neutral, and we think dads wearing babies look extra HOT!




If your guy has a sweet tooth, we've found a fun treat that speaks "dad" a little better than a box of chocolates. The Gumdrop Cookie Shop is a gourmet baking company that creates cookies with customized messages and even photos of your own children!


Okay, so aftershave for Father's Day might be a little cliche. But NuSkin isn't your average aftershave. The Nu Skin for Men Dividends Complete Set is a line of multi-functional products that deliver extra skin care benefits for the guy who isn't likely to spend a lot of time on his skin. The set includes Dividends Shave Cream which gently removes dirt and oil and optimizes razor glide, and an Aftershave Balm which makes facial hair softer, finer and less noticeable so dad can skip a shave without people noticing. Low maintenance, great results.
Most dads don't want or need more stuff for Father's Day. Give the gift that keeps on giving with a donation in his name. Check out World Vision's interactive Father's Day guide to see the top 10 gifts to give in his name, like a fishing set or tools to help people in impoverished countries help themselves. You'll even get a free greeting card with your order.

Is your hubby weary of carrying around your feminine diaper bag? Invented for dads by a dad, Baggino combines style and function in a guy-friendly bag. Not your typical diaper bag, this is a 3-in-1 that conveniently converts into a hands-free baby changing waist belt that looks just like a tool belt. It solves the problem of having to put diaper bags on unsanitary surfaces, floors or cramped spaces. The best part about Baggino is that Dad can sport the diaper bag while still maintaining his manly image, as is doubles as a messenger bag.

how amazing does this look?

Ummm, thank you Real Simple, for the inspiration and kid-friendly breakfast/lunch/dinner idea!


Want to try?   ...

Ingredients
(serves 4)
8 frozen toaster waffles
1 tablespoon Dijon mustard (optional)
1/2 pound sliced deli ham
1/4 pound Cheddar, thinly sliced
4 tablespoons unsalted butter

Directions

1 Place 4 of the waffles on a work surface. Spread one side of each with the mustard (if using). Top with the ham, cheese, and the remaining waffles. Spread the top of each sandwich with 1/2 tablespoon of the butter.
2 Melt the remaining butter in a large nonstick skillet over medium heat. Place the sandwiches in the skillet, buttered-side up. Cook, pressing occasionally with the back of a spatula, until the cheese melts and the waffles are golden, 3 to 4 minutes on each side.
3 Lazy Mama version :: assemble as directed above, and use a panini maker to do the grilling for you.

variations: fried egg sandwiches, peanut butter & banana & honey sandwiches, turkey with smoked applewood bacon and swiss cheese...


Red Rover, Red Rover, send Ali right over.

As weather warms and lazy summery days approach, I find myself getting sappy and nostalgic and introducing my kids to the classic games I grew up with. You know, back when kids played outside for hours without parents hovering over them watching for crazy kid-nappers. Games like “ditch ‘em”, hide & go seek, kick the can, mother may I, red light/green light, red rover, Duck-Duck-Goose…

Can’t you smell the freshly cut grass and feel your heart pumping?

Here is a classic game that I grew up playing that is sure to be a hit with your kiddos:

Drop The Hankerchief
[Recommended with: kids ages 4 and up, 6 or more players, and a grassy yard or park]

This is the sneaky version of Duck, Duck, Goose. Players form a large circle, and stand instead of sitting in a circle. The person that is “It” walks around the outside of the circle and stealthy drops a hankerchief or piece of cloth behind someone. When that person realizes that the cloth has been dropped behind him/her, he/she chases “It” around the circle. If “It” makes it to the empty spot before being tagged then the chaser becomes “It”. It the chaser tags “It” before reaching the empty spot, “It” is “It” again.

{What game did you grow up playing that you play with your kids? We dare you to play a game as a family tonight before you wind down for the night.}